its me...again

this monday is swing club.


kaitie is going to swing club. not me.

the person you see is not kaitie, more like a half kaitie.

she needs to go away.

Kaitie is........Kaitie is......What am i?

i really don't know.


do you?


im lost

and kaitie is far away,


i post to much

but i love it.

i like to rant.
and cry when no one can see me.

like now.

am i really the girl, who is always alone?

i can't explain it.
i feel so....not real.
I'm crying on the inside, which is a side of me you will never see
big buckets of tears, falling like a waterfall.
trying to drown me from the inside out.

I mean it. please. stop. don't.
i feel like i should run.
far far away.
but the Kaitie you know is a fighter.
she does not want to give up.

Am i Kaitie?

On the blog of one of my friends, it asked if when we lost ourselfs, do we become two people.

I think we do.
The Kaitie I know never gives up, shes a fighter.

So i ask you. Am i still Kaitie?

I think i am lost from kaitie.

She and i Are one in the same,

but shes better then who i am now.

i want to find her again.

Kaitie, where are you?

and who am i now?